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TALES FROM THE MATERNITY WARD: A MIM SURVIVAL KIT

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 1. No Visitors Other Than Family.  (Family stays for 30 minutes, tops.) Here's the deal: You will have nurses coming in your room every hour to "check your bottom."  I didn't make that up, that is what they will say: "Turn over so I can check your bottom" as if you were entering prison.  Lactation consultants (affectionally dubbed Nipple Nazis) will be coming in ...

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