Your status is going to change soon, my love. Soon you’ll move to the role of middle child. The weight of your body will feel too big in our arms and we’ll realize too quickly that the dimples in your skin have flattened out, that the pouch which once represented your belly has become hard, and your turned-in little legs have started to take shape with muscle. You will be held to different and higher standards. You will start to be compared. You will be sandwiched in the middle.
I’m a middle child, too. I know what it’s like to feel too young or too old, to have a big sister’s status go unchanged, to suddenly have to be the big kid. To never get to be the first to do something or enjoy the celebration of being last . I know what it’s like to have to fight to direct the scene or call the shots, to have to negotiate, to have to give in without giving up. But do you know what all of these things also make you, my love? They make you independent. They make you caring. They make you fierce and ready to take on challenges. They allow you to be unburdened by the need to be perfect while being self sufficient in your own right.
We are rebellious. We are peacemakers. We know how to be flexible. I hope you take your rebellion and use it to crash through unchartered territory. I hope you use your kindheartedness to build a large and strong community around you. I hope you muster your ability to adapt and navigate and create a beautiful, happy and confident life for yourself.
As you get older remember that you may be sandwiched but all that really means is that you are surrounded. If you start to feel the weight of being compared, remember it’s because you are capable of achieving higher standards. If you find yourself getting weary of constant negotiation, remember that people rely on you because you know how to make them feel better.
But for now, my love – all you have to know is that even though your status might change, our unwavering love for you never will.